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I'm tired.

I know what you might think. We all get tired, right?
False, I'm ALWAYS tired. Always.
Right now I've just finished a 16 oz cup of coffee & I could easily fall into a coma.

I really don't know how much more I can take of just going going going all the time. I work, I'm in school, I work my other job, I work in the hospital, I volunteer at church, I feel like I study all the time. When I force myself to try to relax, I can't. I can barely keep my eyes open & I know I got over 9 hours of sleep last night. I have never wished more for anything in my life. I just want school to be over. I see no end in sight even though I will be done in May. I'm burnt out on life right now. It takes a lot for me to just get up in the mornings. I think I need to actually start listening to my mother and drop some things in my life, so that I can stay sane. But we all know that I won't do that. I have a test (that is not nursing, thank God) in an hour. I feel like I can't even soke in the information. I can't concentrate on anything. I'm a mess.

The worst thing is I know next semester it isn't going to get any better. Working in the hospital alone 36 hours every week will not help me rest. Thinking about that already stresses me out. You see why I drink coffee all the time? I need to up my dosage.

I'm so close to giving up

I received this email this week:

Beth,

I just wanted to infrom you that you will need to meet with either Mrs. Akers or myself this week to fill out a risk for failure form. After the 2nd test, your current test average is 75.02. This is very recoverable and we want to make sure you are successful in this course. Let us know when you can meet.

Mrs.**** &Mrs. ***